6 Signs That She Doesn’t Want to Date You

When you’re young, it can be hard to read women. In fact, there are probably a lot of guys going, “It’s still hard to read them when you’re old.” True. So, as a public service announcement, here are 6 ways you can tell that a woman is not into you:

1) You ask her out and she turns you down: The surest way to find out if a woman is interested in you is to ask her out. If she says, “yes,” and you go on a date, congrats, she was interested. If she says something like, “I’d love to, but I can’t go this Friday. How about next week-end” then you are still golden. On the other hand, if she says “no,” she’s not so into you. The same goes if she postpones multiples times or gives you excuses. “Oh, I can’t. I’m going to be super busy for the next month!” “I’m just not ready for a relationship right now!” “I have to brush my hair.” (I actually got that one in high school once. Not kidding.) If she’s interested, she will go out with you.

2) She makes a point of telling people that you are just her friend:  It’s always brutal to see a guy make a play for a woman and then to see her go out of her way to tell people that they’re just “friends.”

If a woman wants to date you, she is going to be careful about giving you the idea that you’re “just a friend” because once you stick her in that “friend” category, she may never get out of it.

3) Obvious Disinterest: This is more for women that you’ve just met, as opposed to women you know well, although it applies to them as well. If a woman is interested in you, there are typically going to be clusters of signs otherwise known as indicators of interest. She may try to get near you, ask lots of questions about you, ask if you have a girlfriend, look for excuses to touch you, note that she doesn’t have a boyfriend, laugh at your bad jokes, etc, etc. Sometimes, a woman who is just being friendly MAY do some of these things (which is why a cluster of them tells you more). However, very seldom will you ever have a woman who’s interested in you who isn’t doing any of these things. If you’re getting the impression she’s bored, disinterested, or would rather be somewhere else, move on.

4) Talking to you about another guy she’s interested in: This is another one of those classic moves guys that get friend-zoned have to deal with. “My boyfriend doesn’t appreciate me and he cheated on me last summer. You’d NEVER do that. I need to date a guy like you!” The friend-zoned guys hear the last part but fail to note that if she really wanted you, she wouldn’t be telling you about her heartbreak with another guy, which is what she does with her GIRLFRIENDS. Are you her girlfriend? No? Then she’s not going to be talking about other guys she’s romantically connected with unless it’s an attempt to make you jealous.

5) She flakes on you: This is something guys now regularly have to deal with if you’re doing online dating. You start talking to a woman, things are going well, you set a date and… she never shows up. Why would a woman do that rather than just turning you down? Because a lot of women don’t want to risk you getting upset or angry if they tell you they aren’t that interested and it’s easier to just not show up and block. If a woman is interested and can’t make a date, she will definitely reach out apologetically to set up another time for the two of you to get together.

6) She lets you know early on that she has a boyfriend: If a woman gets an interested vibe from you and the interest isn’t returned, she will often spontaneously note that she has a boyfriend. Whether this is true or not, it’s designed to dissuade you from pursuing her. This is also distinguished from when things are going really well, you think you may be heading towards having sex with her and as a casual aside, she notes that she has a boyfriend. Women tend to do that so that the next morning they can tell themselves (and possibly their girlfriends) “I had no intention of having sex with him. I just got carried away and it just happened.”